Life of a mediocre NUS accounting student

So school's out and 4 years of being an NUS Accounting student is (almost and unofficially) over!! :)

It has definitely been an interesting 4 years. That's a nice way of saying that it really really has been an emotionally challenging 4 years. Because for the past couple of years, I found myself really struggling with the fact that I wasn't performing up to my expectations.

(I know, it sounds a little stupid sometimes because there are other people out there struggling with much much more challenging things in life. But please bear with me.)

Like a true blue Biz student, I've provided a diagram that explains... my 4 years (as well as pretty much the rest of this post. But please read the rest HAHA)

A CAP of 4.0 means means graduating with a Second (upper) class, which is often the benchmark of what it means to graduate with a "good class" or whatever to call it. This is also a pretty depressing graph.

In a true Buzzfeed/Thoughtcatalog/stuffthatfloodsfacebooknewsfeeds.com style, here I am to debunk some myths in NUS Accounting, or even NUS itself. (K la, just trying to be a bit more entertaining here haha)

Myth #1: Your CAP doesn't move much after your first year

Coming into NUS with decent grades, it seemed like an achievable thing to do. Year 1 yielded promising results, showing that I was (sort of) on track. But OBVIOUSLY, reality and humility really slapped me hard in the face in Year 2 AND Year 3 Sem 1 when my grades just took a kamikaze nose dive. I was pretty devastated... both times. 

It really seemed so ridiculous to me at that time! TBH, I was quite shaken emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. I thought that I would glorify God through my results (and the way I do things, which hasn't always been the best either). And there comes my results telling me "That's not God's plan, that's just yours".

Myth #2: You're pretty much locked in to the grades/class you have by Year3/4

I honestly truly and sincerely believed with my heart in this myth, because that's what everyone says (myself included). Essentially, I gave up la.

Starting Y3S2 and the exact mid point between second upper and second lower, I was pretty much resigned that that was my fate. My dad used to tell me "It's not over till it's over" to encourage me that I can still pull my grades up, but I was honestly too disappointed and resigned to believe in that.

I remember committing my results to God in Y3S2 and Year 4 itself, but that was largely because I didn't see how anything would change. According to my dad, he said that it really seemed like I lost my drive :(. I studied hard, but not quite with the intention to change things. Just happened to be taking modules that I really enjoyed studying, with great profs like Prof Julie Huan (ACC3604 Corporate Law) and Prof Simon Poh (ACC4611 Advanced Taxation), and great friends to work with. 

So needless to say, getting better results came as a pleasant surprise. I was really really really dayummmmm stunned, especially after Y4S1 when I realised that a second upper was actually within reach (I really thought was near impossible!). Truly, God has been gracious in showing me how He works, and that He is the ever present and active God. I mean, I practically gave up in Year 3 already, but He hauled me up to whatever I have today even though I was so undeserving.

Myth #3: You kinda know the game after awhile

Honestly, there is only so much that one can do, and so much more that one cannot control. Sure, there are people who 'get it' better than others, but most of us don't get it right all time. You cannot control things like the way your prof grades, or how smart your classmates are. Heck, I have a Dean's Lister friend who read an exam question wrongly, at Year 4 nonetheless! Sometimes these things work in your favour, sometimes they don't.

And I guess this is a testament to the fact that we are not in control. Rather, God is in control.

THAT BEING SAID, I have to be honest and say that I struggle being contented with that. Honest, I fight it with every fleshly fibre of my being (some days more than others). Now that the last of my assessments and exams are over, and as I sit and twiddle my thumbs and wait for my results to be released without being able to do anything at all, I am struggling really hard to find contentment in letting God take control because I have no idea what's going to happen.

This sounds super lag, but it took me 2-3 years (or maybe my entire education journey) to come to have to tell myself that my value does not lie in the grades that I have, because I do already have a good life ahead :) (God-willing of course).

By a 'good life', I don't mean a high-flying job or an assured path of a successful career. Or a rich tai tai life although that sounds pretty good. Keeeding :)
By a 'good life', I mean that salvation is certain, regardless of how I perform (in school, at work, etc).

God has been gracious in more ways than one, at especially when I was undeserving of whatever He has blessed me with. Whether it's my grades, or even His love for me because I (obviously) do not trust and obey very well.

So dear friends (if it's convenient), on 30 May 2016, please watch out for me. No matter how happy or distraught I will be on that day heh. Because honestly, I still struggle (some days more than others). 

P.S. I am just a mediocre student struggling just like many. But perhaps out there somewhere, is a mediocre student just like me who struggles between expectations and reality, and needs to be hauled out of the  negativity that surrounds us sometimes. I hope this encourages you to believe that things CAN get better.

P.P.S Or perhaps there's a Christian student out there that needs to be reminded that his/her value and identity does not lie in his CAP/GPA, or even the expectations of people! Our identity lies in the fact that salvation is there for us, and there is more that we are called to do than graduate with first class honours. Trusting and obeying is hard, and I hope that you have friends around you to help you to do so! If you need a friend, and if I know you well enough, just let me know.

For memory's sake (and for people who google for module reviews like I do)

ACC3604 Prof Julie Huan (Corporate Law) was amaaaazingggg. She was an engaging prof even at 8am lessons when brains weren't warmed up yet. With her, it wasn't just about going through the contents in the syllabus, but encouraging and teaching students how to read the law for ourselves. It's amazing how she teaches a skill rather that random facts that many of the other profs do.

ACC4611 Prof Simon Poh (Advanced Tax) was a great prof as well. Although his lessons were Friday 8am classes when people are least inclined to think, his dead-pan humour definitely kept us engaged and laughing. Going for his classes were like going for stand-up comedy (serious, this guy is legendary), but we learn stuff too, which is awesome. Also another prof who teaches people how to think and apply.
HY2253 Prof Bruce Lockhart (Christianity in World History) The module was really interesting, you get to learn a lot of perspective on top of interesting historical events. Prof Lockhart is humorous and brilliant, to say the least. From what I hear in other modules, he has been able to make everything interesting. But fair warning, it is not easy to score.

Follow that Rainbow

(Hello my dusty blog. It has been awhile, but I think this memory is one worth documenting, because many nice things happened. Photos from R and stranger gentlemen H)

On Monday morning 23 March, I woke up to the news of Mr Lee Kuan Yew's death. It was everywhere; social media, mainstream media, conversations with most people I've met over the week. The week was an extremely gloomy one; because the nation was mourning over her founding father.

I've always highly respected this man, even though technically, I've hardly/never experienced his direct leadership being a millenial/Gen Y. I suppose it was due to the influence of how my parents both spoke so highly of him as a visionary, and how his outlook on work and life is something that in many ways, is worth looking up to and following

I had already missed joining the super duper snaking long queues at the Padang, because the only night (Friday) in which I was willing to sacrifice was the night of a 10 hour queue. Singaporeans, we queue so well (Hello Kitty and good hawker stalls have trained us well. I mean this as a compliment :).). I had cat class retreat on the following morning, so the only option left was Mr Lee's last journey across Singapore; from the Parliament House to NUS on Sunday afternoon.

On Saturday night, I packed a pair on sunglasses into my bag, preparing to stand in the typical hot SG weather on Sunday. I was happily thinking to myself "Yay, I can finally bring out my Swedish sunglasses again. So proud that I thought of that before going to bed.".

It rained. It rained heavily.

(What a wonderful and cool... SHUT UP LA JH)

A friend R brought an umbrella, but it was honestly too small. To make matters worse, the umbrella was dripping on me more than it was providing shelter. For some reason, no matter how I shifted or positioned myself, the umbrella would somehow find itself dripping on my FACE. Thankfully the people standing next to us had the big ones, and were fairly concerned when I started shifting uncomfortably (maybe I was being a nuisance :P). I was standing under their umbrella for at least an hour, and it really helped a lot ^^.

Subsequently some kind soul gave out ponchos so that (1) people would put down their umbrellas so that the back rows can still see, and (2) no more dripping on faces. To be fair, the people at the front row already agreed to tough it out and put down their umbrellas when the gun carriage approaches. So you can see how so much kindness have just came out from this rain happening.

We braved two hours in the rain for this fleeting moment of the gun carriage driving past. It goes without saying that we were desparate to witness this moment, to say our final goodbye. Now, we were initially standing on the pavements along Clementi, which is quite a distance from the route. When the officials finally gave us the green like to go on to the road, I honestly half-expected a mad dash of fighting for your spot, that the queues formed on the pavements didn't matter because the system will 'reset'. I was so happy to be proven wrong; we still scurried, but we scurried in an unspoken formation, progressing forward together holding on to a row of our state flags along the entire stretch of the road.

We were constantly updated by R's live feed of the procession. When we started seeing police cars, the crowd kept chanting 'LEE KUAN YEW, LEE KUAN YEW'. But when we saw the crescent moon and stars in a sea of crimson blanketing that box for that fleeting moment, our voices broke for we broke down unanimously. The cheering stopped, and the wailing began.

It was a heartbreaking, no, heart-wrenching moment for us, but it turned into something beautiful. Strangers turned to each other, hugging, huddling and wailing in the rain. It was a gloomy and solemn occasion, but it did not deter us from sharing our hopes and dreams for our nation. We acknowledged what Mr Lee has done for us, and inspired each other to do even more.
(Some people were even picking up litter :))

It started with the lady on the extreme right telling R 'Hey girl, remember to take your umbrella'. She was all teary-eyed, compelling R and I to give her a hug. The gentleman H

came up to us and comforted us, and shared with us the photos that he took, and gave R and I advice, since we are the next generation.

Earlier in the week, his passing was saddening to me, but most definitely not overwhelming. I had not fully accepted his death earlier today, hoping that he would stay true to his words "Even from my sickbed, even if you are going to lower me to the grave and I feel that something is going wrong, I will get up.".  I was honestly quite surprised that he had meant enough to me to cause me to break down and even wail. I didn't know that he had meant so much to me.

It was a really powerful experience. It was good closure, helping me to accept his death. More importantly, reminding me to move forward following what he stood for.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvGk5cMwXf8
Look at that horizon,
Follow that rainbow,
Go ride it,
Not all will be rich,
Quite a few will find a grain of gold,
Dig it up!

In summary, this was my experience
(1) Filled with wonderful instances
(2) The rain is over, now let's follow that rainbow
(3) An umbrella/poncho is more important than a pair of sunglasses B)

Have a good week ahead Singapore!

(I really hope I won't fall sick after 2 hours in the rain, and staying in wet clothes for another 2 hours)

HELLO, MY NAME IS ELDER PRICE

I had to go to London because my permit expired before my flight back to Singapore, and I’d risk getting detained by the Swedish customs on the way back if I didn’t leave the Schengen region. Even though it was a day, it was an epic trip, and I could not ask for a better way to end my Euro tour.

Turns out that I almost got detained at the customs in London. The London customs tend to ask a lot of questions to get a sense of who you are bla bla bla. The officer at the counter asked a lot more questions than usual, and he felt that he wasn’t convinced that he should let me into London. I can’t really type the full conversation here, but it was quite an annoying experience. After which, he confiscated my passport and permit and in my head it was like “Walao, in trying to avoid getting detained in Stockholm, I get detained in London”.

Well, his officer cleared me in the end J Thank you boss.

I stayed with Becky, who was my classmate and CCA-mate back in secondary school. It has been many years since we’ve last met and LOL we meet in London. It’s really nice how she crammed in supper and breakfast with me, despite having some rather intense 14 hours/day summer program in school.

After breakfast with Becky, I decided to try queuing for the ridiculously cheap £5(~S$10) Matilda tickets. They sell 16 of these tickets each day and I bought the 15^th ticket!! Here’s a success selfie with the person who bought the 14^th ticket!

We were really lucky because we had only queued for half an hour. In fact, we were probably the 18^th and 19^th in line, but a Korean band of 4 decided to leave because they couldn’t get 4 in a row so YAY for us!

Went to Regent’s Park after a short nap, to chill with a honey cake and a book. I’m definitely going to miss the vast-open-area-park concept! Parks like these are slowly dwindling in Singapore, or at the very least they aren’t as vast.

Given that I had managed to buy the 15^th ticket while queuing for only half an hour, I thought I was feeling really lucky with tickets that day. So I thought “Hey let’s try my luck for the Book of Mormon lottery!”. I formed an alliance with a Brit who had come alone, and Siying & her bf came down to help me ballot as well haha, giving me 4 chances to win.

When 19 tickets had already been given, and they drew the next slip (which didn’t look like mine given the way it was folded), I thought my chances were over. Wasn’t that bad, at the very least, I had Matilda to catch! Turns out that that funny looking slip only requested for ONE ticket, which meant that there was ONE more left.

When the guy drew the next slip, he stared right at me with a wide smile (and it my head it was like “Mai kp la, you mocking me?”)

“This is a ‘ditch’ ticket! OHHH. I’m looking right at you because I remember your name! JIA HUI YAM!!” (He remembered because he was trying to tell my alliance to look out for my name and it just left him confused)

-STUNNED STUNNED STUNNED- -JUST DIED- -WHATJUSTHAPPENED- -AAAAAAAHHHHHHH- -SURREAL- -INCREDIBLE LUCK-

(And one slip was actually disqualified because they only wrote their first name)

So I ditched my alliance, and because we were strangers no hard feelings at all.

OMG I FELT LIKE THE LUCKIEST GIRL IN THE WORLD. THE MUSICAL THAT I WANTED TO WATCH THE MOST IN EXCHANGE IS NOW MINEEEEEEE. HAVEN’T FELT SO SURREAL IN SUCH A LONG TIME HAHAHAHA.

And I ditched my Matilda ticket, selling it to some Asian girl I met at a dodgy ticket office holding a Matilda pamphlet. Think I made her feel extremely lucky, because she was in disbelief that I actually had a ticket to sell, and we were cutting the deal in the middle of the streets. Furthermore, I sold it for only £5, the price I had bought it for.

There couldn’t have been a better way to end exchange than watching the Book of Mormon, partly due to the anticipation, and front row seats for £20. The musical was extremely hilarious, to say the least, though at times the jokes were a little too insulting and crude. But still, very very enjoyable, exceeded exceeding my expectations, even after watching Youtube videos and listening to the soundtrack. (Not enough ways to explain how I was blown away)

The best part of the musical? THIS GORGEOUS HUMAN BEING, AKA GAVIN CREEL. (Top left corner)

Appropriately buff, and dimples. Couldn’t help but swoon at his lovely voice when he was only 10 metres away from me. From then on, I left my heart in London.

Also, while watching the musical, I realised that I had actually met one of the performers. I was wondering why he had look SOOOO FAMILIAR. In the last lottery I went for in May, there was a Brit that kept talking nonsense “Show’s cancelled, no lottery” “I know exactly how and when to put a winning slip in”. He came with a HUGE group of 20 people who kept squeezing with me and JX, so that’s why they were memorable. ANDD he was holding a Starbucks cup with his name on it. Searched for the cast online after that and YES IT WAS HIM – EVAN JAMES. He winked at me during the show, and I’m not sure if it was intentional or not (doubt it heh).

There are always happy endings, it just depends on where you choose to end it. My Euro tour (and well, in a way exchange as well) ended on that night ^^.

Rome and all it's epicness

Rome was a place in which my resourcefulness and street-smartness was put to the test like never before.

It's messy
It's dodgy
It's crowded
AND many things don't work!

Here is a list of things that weren't working in my short 4 days in Rome:
The train
An ENTIRE telephone network (Imagine starhub breaking down for a day)
Trevi Fountain (Just about one of the most famous landmarks)
Traffic lights

On the day that I arrived in Rome, I was supposed to find XY, and we would go to the host's home. But her flight got delayed for an hour, and I didn't stick to the meeting point thinking that we had to meet the host by a certain time. Well... she missed out the part where we would call the host first before meeting her so I went over to the bus stop first. And I didn't have the address either.

There was no one at the bus stop waiting... And I just thought "GG HONGS HONGS HONGS". It was a time of desparate praying for journey mercies then.

Thankfully there was a cafe at the bus stop operated by a Chinese national, so I asked for wifi access. But the wifi was down that day -.- (#hongs). Thankfully the lady told me that there was a computer/internet/international calls shop further down the street. So I booked myself a hostel, and just as I was about to log out, XY responded to my FB message. WAO

The Last of Stockholm

These photos were taken in early June, the last few weeks left in Stocholm (after which it would be my last trip). I'm now back in Singapore, but I remember being bipolar then - wishing that I was already home, yet wishing not wanting exchange to end. But all these only goes to show how blessed I am to have had so many enjoyable things in my life that I hold so dear to me, whether it's exchange or Singapore.

This was taken close to 11pm. The sun doesn't really go down, it just gets dim. Kinda reminds me of how my life is, that the sun doesn't really go down on me, not entirely.

Princess cake! The Swedish food that I enjoy the most (or rather the only thing I'd miss heh).
Sponge cake, rasperry jam, vanilla cream, whipped cream, and a fondant layer!

The back of my hostel, Idun

Food festival at Kungstragarden, with tons of stalls of different types of cuisines. We were really excited about it, but if you think about it, our hawker centres are just like this!

Biker gang polaroids ^^

Random atas neighbourhood

Double rainbow ^^

Went to the Vasa Museum in Stockholm, which is essentially a museum on a war ship that sank 15 mins after setting sail... It's supposedly the most interesting museum in Stockholm. Okay it was pretty cool, but I'm not really a museum type of person tbh.

The diving bell had wifi

 

The last of my biking days! SY, Kenelm and I went to Hagaparken to cycle and roll around and clown around. We even filmed ourselves singing 'Obviously', being pretentious YouTubers, calling ourselves the Stockholm Squirrels... (I blame SY)

This is Xiaoming, one of my neighbours along the corridor. It's funny how I'm the first person that she meets when we moved in, and I'm the last person she sees in Idun before she leaves.

When Nigel & Chunhan both left, and Idun was so quiet. I thought that the day after that would have been a long day, but there were little perks that helped brighten my day. Went out for fika with Kenelm, skyped with JW, and got this in the mail from Lydia!! :D

Barcelona Day 3 - A Very Powerful

Sagrada Familia is about the most spectacular religious building I've been to in Europe, even though it has not been completed. In Europe, there are tons and tons of religious buildings - churches, synagogues, temples, basilicas etc, but hands down this one actually MEANT SOMETHING.

If you do go there, please get an audio guide to better appreciate this building. As a Christian, the building was really quite powerful (as Yip had told me earlier), because of all the symbolism behind them. And you can see that the symbolism isn't easy to create, and there was massive detail in the sculptures and different art forms. The building hasn't been completed, so there's so much more that I haven't even seen (ie the Glory facade, and the 'roof') and I've already been blown away.

The pillars were designed in the shape of trees, to represent community 

The Nativity Facade, depicting Jesus's birth/childhood

The Passion Facade, representing the events leading to the crucifiction of Christ

It has been 200 years since construction began, and there's about 20++ more years to go. I hope to be able to see the completed building someday!

Barcelona Day 2 - Montserrat

Heeding the advice of Louis from cell, we took a daytrip to Montserrat to enjoy some scenery! Montserrat's a mountainous region, and mountains look just like gigantic fingers! 

It was a morning of breathtaking views, and enjoying creation :) It took us a bit of a hike (on top of spending quite a bit on trains and funiculars) to get to a good viewing point. But it was extremely rewarding - the view, the quietness, the breezes and sunshine. Enjoy the photos!

Throwing rocks down the mountains. I made sure no one was below, but I killed a deer. KIDDING

Part of the route in Montserrat has a series of sculptures of Jesus's life, which was really interesting. Though towards the end, there was stuff on Santa Maria (Mary), because this is actually part of the Catholic pilgrimage to begin with.

Monastery in Montserrat!